Giving a Child the Best Life in Two Homes - Divorce and Co-parenting with Fiona Kong
Fiona Kong, an author and a single parent, joins Julia for a conversation about her book titled Home Sweet Homes Journal. Fiona's life underwent significant changes with divorce, a job loss, and the impact of the COVID pandemic. During this transformative period, Fiona took the opportunity to contemplate her upbringing and the kind of co-parent she aspired to become. During this period, the idea for the Home Sweet Homes Journal and Planner came to be. Fiona has devised a valuable resource that enables parents to support their children's transition between homes as well as to gain insight into their child's experiences while they spend time with the other parent. This episode is for any parent, no matter how you build your family.
IN THIS EPISODE:
[02:31] Fiona separates from her husband and loses her job in 2019, and she describes the grieving process
[05:57] Instagram and co-parenting books helped Fiona transition through this challenging time
[07:44] How to tell a two ½-year-old they will be spending time with mom and then time with dad and how a visual schedule helped
[11:28] How Fiona and her ex-husband determined how they would co-parent, and after time, they admitted their contribution to the divorce
[15:31] What drove Fiona to take responsibility for her part in their divorce and how her father fostered an unhealthy atmosphere when she was growing up
[20:22] Fiona describes how she developed a planner to become a part of her son’s life when he was not with her and how it evolved, and she shares different features of the book and tells about her next venture
[32:13] What do you experience going from time with a child and partner 50 percent of the time to time alone with no child and no partner 50 percent of the time
[36:28] Fiona discusses how mediation has helped her, and she discusses what family means to her
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
It’s important to have a visual aide, like a schedule, to explain to a child how their week will unfold concerning visitation between parents.
A divorced single parent should be aware of their child’s mental health but should also take time for self-care.
When divorced parents decide to work in the child's best interest, that contributes to a more regular upbringing for that child.
RESOURCE LINKS:
BIOGRAPHY:
I'm Fiona Kong, founder of the Home Sweet Homes journal and planner for co-parents and children.
I'm a single mom to a 5-year-old boy. I'm a former analyst turned dreamer turned creator and small business owner after finding a lack of resources and tools available to support young children after a separation or divorce.
After my son's dad and I separated, I remember feeling so many things. I was stressed, anxious, and worried about my son adjusting to the constant back and forth between homes. I felt sad to miss out on my son's day-to-day life. And I also felt guilty for putting my son through this situation.
And so, I looked for tools or products that could help those who co-parented but found few existing solutions - especially something geared toward young children.
My mission through Home Sweet Homes is to help co-parents and their children stay connected while bringing a child comfort and joy across their two homes.
By combining the benefits of a journal and planner into a tool that stays with your child, I hope to bring positivity out of a stressful and hard event.
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